Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. Carmen Harra A famous singer in Romania during my youth, I became and remained the breadwinner of my family from a very young age.
Everything my loved ones wanted, they got, from houses to cars to the finest education. This constant “giving” continued throughout my life. But along the way, my family trickled away: My sister left to Europe, my daughters all grew up, and my parents and husband passed away.
I found myself with, well, no one to please In my eyes my husband was the most wonderful, handsome, and perfect man alive. But after his passing over four years ago, there were suddenly more hours in the day.
And with my three grown daughters off on their own, I had no laundry to do, no bills to pay, and no messes to clean up. I was also no longer a shoulder to cry on or dear confidante in need. I could work less and have more free time. But the question was, what would I do with it? I moved to Florida near the beach soon after my husband’s death. To occupy my new-found leisure, I meditated on the gently crashing waves and tried to decipher the seagulls’ sad songs.
It was during one of these sessions that I realized just how much I adored the ocean. Yet I so rarely experienced its splendor, because I had been investing my time in everything and everyone but myself. I had, in fact, exhausted my powers for the pure love of others.
My anecdote is the reality of many: The majority of us seldom put ourselves in first place. We dress according to trends and style our hair from magazines. But in doing so, are we doing what we love or do we love conforming to the whims of the world?
Are we truly free, or is our freedom entirely dependent on the impressions of others? Honestly answer these three questions: When was the last time I did something I loved? What have I done to better myself in the past month? To whom do I listen? You will better understand how your energy is consumed based on your answers. If you feel you deserve more self-care, put into practice the following 10 ways to invest in your own welfare and watch your inherent strength resurface: Discover your true needs.
No two people have the exact same needs. Establish what’s most important for you to gain, have, and keep in your life, e.
Even if you think you already possess a healthy dose of self-esteem, work to improve your opinion of yourself. This calls for a remorseless disposal of fears and perceived insecurities as well as the healing of old wounds once and for all.